Normally, winter is not big deal to me. It's annoying in Kentucky because of it being just around freezing, and cloudy. I don't usually get to the point of really complaining often and cursing the weather for affecting me. This winter, though, I was just over it. By like January 3rd, I was like wow, this is no fun.
Life gets like that too, sometimes.
The usual stuff of life can seem like no big deal, day to day, month to month, year to year....then it hits you. You start to notice. Something gives just enough to make you want to leave or change things up or just have some alternative. What was no big deal, what was bearable, suddenly seems heavy and fits you all wrong.
That's what happened to me lately.
Winter annoyed me, because my life had some aspects that were annoying me. I couldn't just push through and feel like I was living the full life I am meant to live and love. I don't just mean it got hard. No, I've had harder seasons of life than this one.
I feel like what's happening in my heart is a natural progression. It's like when I was outgrowing my Barbie dolls. If you are becoming a teenager and then adult (and you don't have some strange over-fascination with Barbies), they just lose their fun factor. Other aspects of life and goals become important, and the timing is ready for me to shift into some other roles.
This is a bit of an awkward time for me now. I'm wrapping up some of my involvement with the university (and leaving that job on a good note), starting a new job, and starting to invest myself more fully into changing education for some kids in Campbellsville. And those three things are all confusing right now. It's transition and it's slightly awkward and I am finding my place.
I can feel the Lord so close though. When someone asked me the other day what God is showing me lately, my answer was "that I am really taken care of." That's the strongest message I'm hearing/feeling/knowing as I navigate these waters. I have peace from the Lord and provision. People are honoring me in so many ways, and it's making it easier for me to feel out the new paths, to explore the territories and map out my next moves.
Winter is over, y'all. It's time for those dormant places to wake up and start to grow so that, come Fall, we have a harvest.
What season do you feel like you're in now?